Complaints

I want a baby and I have non-stress induced insomnia. I don't think the two are related.

Really?!

I am staying in the Ghetto. No really. There was a carving knife next to the computer on the front desk when I checked in. I noticed it right after the front desk guy finished telling me how freaked out he was to be alone at the desk at night in this neighborhood. Also, my door doesn't have a room number; just a piece of paper with a number typed on it that's taped to the front. The door also only locks if you pull it inward and slide the bolt at exactly the same moment that you lift up on the door handle.

I'm too tired to care anymore and at least I don't have to stay here alone. Ms. Wonderful from our office agreed to help me out with the fair this weekend and she is being an awfully good sport; especially because we are the only women in the hotel. Maybe I'll pop over to the gas station next door and grab myself a beverage to cheer myself up. In the meantime I've booby trapped the door and demanded that the front desk fix my lock ASAP.

Thought Shots

• I often wonder how I, who is slightly paranoid and jumpy, seem to find myself in exactly the unlikely situations that I fear will happen but never do for anyone other than me.
• For any of you who have been considering a career in exotic dancing but have hesitated for fear that you don't have the desirable body type; fear no more! There is a niche for us in Oregon at the Jiggly Dancers Club. Yes!
• Watching the Vice-Presidential debates tonight inspired me to reflect on my preference for entertainment over things that are true and/or good.
• The following quote from William Young's book, The Shack, could potentially change my life "It is true that relationships are a whole lot messier than rules, but rules will never give you answers to the deep questions of your heart and they will never love you."

Oxygen, Dirty Restrooms and a Plea for Justice

You know what I think should be a crime? Charging someone to use the restroom.

Making me pay 5 bucks or buy a food item just to use the bathroom facilities is as ridiculous as putting a tax on oxygen inhalation. Regular access to a bathroom is a survival necessity common to all of us; like breathing.

It is a sad injustice to demand pay for a service that should be readily available to all.

Just One of Those Days

Do you ever have those days where everything inexplicably goes right? You miss your bus only to be picked up by Johnny Depp in his personal limo or you trip over a mysterious briefcase in the parking lot on your way into the office which ends up containing super secret information that government is willing to pay an exorbitant amount of money to have returned, for example. Well, so far, my first few days on the road have been down right magical. I ask and God provides. I don't even know to ask and it's already provided. Today the guy really outdid Himself. I was looking for a place to pull over to read my book in the shade while I waited for my next High School visit when, lo and behold, what should I spot in front of me? A beautiful, peaceful, shady street with the name Ellen Park. So I did.

T-R-O-U-B-L-E

Now that I have a GPS, I find that I am in love with driving in California . I know that sounds crazy but I love the speed, the spontaneous lane changes, and the way that the cars look like lines of thread being woven into complex patterns on a loom. I am challenged and stimulated by the creativity and planning that is required to safely navigate through traffic and I find that I feel more at home in this fast paced, almost arrogant atmosphere, than I have in a long time. That probably means I should buy a motorcycle. Immediately.

It's 5 O'clock Somewhere

After an unexpectedly long day of travel, I arrived at my hotel to check in and was pleasantly surprised to learn about the newly concieved hotel happy hour that was to be held on the following evening. Free beer, wine and appetizers from 6-7:30pm in the breakfast room. What a fascinating idea...

Unfortunately, I wasn't able to partake as I had a previously scheduled meeting during the aforementioned festivity. However, I am still intrigued and plan on coming back next year to participate in the phenomena.