I Almost Forgot

Happy Halloween!

Drunken Noodle

A poem in honor of my time in Eugene

I am Phad Se Ew seated across from you
Tucked away.
In a corner booth by the window
because of the light.

Hungry?
Kahlua Cheesecake, Minthe Gelato and a box of Hot Tamales
I am Dracula

Early morning coffee
Lemonade
Free drinks
So I do
There's a soy margarine raptor in my oatmeal
I am thirsty and I ache
Through the window I notice that it's a tequila sunset

Silliness
Musical partners in 3 person cranium
Would you P-H-M-M mucho burrito
It is Y and I am finally H
We stay up late whispering secrets into the night

Tofu scramble and a heart unburdened
I sit across from you in the corner window seat
Always the window seat
And I miss you

True or False...

Love and suffering are inextricably linked.

Please support your answer.

Red Head Review

One of the best perks about my job is that I get to drive around great cars for free. Well, technically someone is paying for them. I'm not the one who gets the bill though so that counts as free right?

So far I have had the privilege of driving four very different, and much fancier than I will ever own in real life, vehicles. You will find my review of them below.

Ratings are based on a scale of 1-5 stars*

Silver 2007 Pontiac G6
***
Great for California driving. Fast, fun and easy to maneuver. Handles curves at high speeds like a champ. Unfortunately the placement of the car frame turns changing lanes into a Russian roulette style gamble.

Midnight Blue 2007 Nissan Sentra
*****
I love this car! It is stylish, sexy and drives like a dream. Great visibility and lots of fun bells and whistles that make traveling long distances not only manageable but enjoyable.

Periwinkle 2007 Dodge Caliber
*
This car looks like it would be fun to drive but don't be fooled. It's a death trap on wheels. Poor visibility, terrible traction and confusing mechanics that can result in many a near collision. It's also impossible to store anything in this car since the hatchback design screams "please smash my windows and take everything". Pretty but don't touch.

Red 2007 Ford Fusion
***
Reliable, attractive and easy to handle. A little slow to speed up and not good on hills. A subtle choice but still quality.

Midnight Mystery

I was lying in bed late the other night going through my usual nightly routine of looking up comedians on you tube when lo and behold, there was a knock at the door. I ignored it, being in a pajamad and exhausted state. But then, the doorbell rang which woke up the dog who began barking which woke up the roommate who poked her head into the hall looking as befuddled and disgruntled as I felt. After ascertaining that neither of us was expecting company we agreed NOT to answer the door. Mystery Creepy Person must have heard us whispering though because they began banging insistently on the door. My karate expert housemate braved a look through the peep hole at this point and reported back that there was no one there. We returned to our respective beds thoroughly creeped out for a night of restless sleep. Any helpful or creative theories on what might have occurred that could help ease my mind?

It's Just For Fun

http://www.ocala.com/stagnant/redhead/facts.html?nocache=1

Be sure to check out the proverbs.

A Typical Day On the Road

5:00 am: Wake up
6:00 am: Check out and load up car
6:15 am: Coffee and possibly breakfast
6:30 am: Drive to next town
8:00-9:00 am: First High School Visit
9:30-10:30 am: Second High School Visit
11 am-12 pm: Third High School Visit
12:15-1:15 pm: Lunch at the nearest, fastest food place.
1:30-3:30 pm: Fourth High School Visit
3:45 pm: Check in to hotel. Throw bags in the room. Lay on the bed taking deep breaths for 15 minutes
4 pm: Change into suit and freshen up
4:30 pm: Leave for College Fair
5:00 pm: Set up table at the fair
6-9 pm: College Fair
9-11 pm: Diner with other Reps
11:30 pm: Return to hotel and wind down.
Midnight: Sleep so as to be prepared to start over again the next day

Variations on this include:
Driving in place of High School Visits 2 & 4
Less school visits or no night fair
Getting lost :)

And I though California Drivers Were Scary

Portland is definitely worse. High speeds, neurotic lane changes and bad signage. It's the 10 different streets heading in 10 different directions with the same names that really mess me up. I can handle fast and even neurotic on occasion but confusing me with weird streets when my directions are perfectly logical makes me really angry.

My Own Personal Hell

I occasionally get migraine headaches. They are usually brought on by lack of sleep, dehydration, stress or waiting too long to eat food. Every once in a great while, however, they come upon me violently, without warning and for no particular reason. Such was the case yesterday when I had 4 hours of driving, a college fair and some high school visits to do. When these particularly nasty spells occur I always find myself, head over toilet bowl, convinced that were I to visit hell, it would consist mainly of endless migraines accompanied by nausea and hopelessness. Thank God I don't have to endure that kind of pain for eternity!

Untitled

I had a dream last night. In the dream I am talking on the phone to the man I love while driving through twisted forest roads. Suddenly, he appears. Overjoyed, I try to run to him but we are separated by glass and all I can do is press my hand up to the pane where his palm faces mine. I am hurt by his calm face and ashamed of my transparent emotions. I turn away and he leaves me; walking away down the wrong path to the place we are supposed to be staying together. The line goes dead. I am angry at him for leaving me and for going the wrong way but I am more afraid of being alone than I am angry so I abandon my family and run after him. All the while I feel guilty because I know this rocky path is the wrong way and that I should let him go, but I can't. I am afraid that if I don't follow him I will lose him forever. He hears me and turns to look back. As soon as our eyes meet I see that I have lost him already.